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Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons

Cartoons about things that are dead .

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Result page:     (17 images)


1. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2018-01-01 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2018-01-01 Pub. Date: 2018-01-01
Image Number: 166840
Caption: In a strange land, the natives play a bizarre game in which some contestant start with a huge advantage. Score. Player 1 132. Player 2 0. Victory is achieved through a combination of skill and chance. Aw, @#*! Snake eyes again?! Ha ha! Winners receive lavish prizes, while losers are left for dead. Well, he lost! Here lies Mr. Perkins "he tried." The U.S. economy: It's the ultimate in extreme gamin! It's like Calvinball, only better!
     
2. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2016-11-28 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-11-28 Pub. Date: 2016-11-28
Image Number: 151737
Caption: Crude Awakening. I'm reporting live from the Standing Rock pipeline protest with a Sioux leader. Water is life. You know the luxury pickups driven by America's suburban dads aren't going to fuel themselves, right? Why do you hate fun? Um … the police are - And why do you care so much about ancient burial grounds? It's like, hello? Aren't those people already dead? Watch out for the - rubber bullets. Blam! Auugh! Grooaan. Also, you'll want to avoid the attack dogs.
     
3. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2016-07-11 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-07-11 Pub. Date: 2016-07-11
Image Number: 145997
Caption: To paraphrase a recent statement by Obama, the Dallas police sniper didn't represent African-Americans … Black Lives Matter … ice line do not cro … any more than the Charleston shooter represented white Americans … Nine dead in church shooting … or the Orlando and San Bernardino shooters represented Muslim Americans. Breaking: 47 killed in Florida nightclub. We are united by our sorrow. And by one other thing" Bomb delivery robots?!?
     
4. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2016-05-09 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2016-05-09 Pub. Date: 2016-05-09
Image Number: 143200
Caption: Four toddlers around the U.S. shot and killed themselves in one week in April. Ammo. Eh, shootin' happens. What would it take to make some people care? Breaking: Toddler finds gun, shoots other guns in dad's collection. At least four weapons dead, including a 2-year-old Magnum and 3-year-old AK-47. NRA Chapter Meeting. Why?? Sniff! Those young guns never had a chance. We must do something! Sadly, it's likely more will be shot. Fine, I'll support trigger locks! RIP Betty Beretta. Anything to stop this madness!
     
5. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2014-01-20 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2014-01-20 Pub. Date: 2014-01-20
Image Number: 106637
Caption: U.N. scientists: If we don't cut carbon emissions within 15 years, we'll have to rely on technology that doesn't exist yet to remove it from the atmosphere. In 2029: We really should get to work on that CO2-sucking device. Whatevs. Later … Scientists say our biodome will be underwater soon! Eh, we'll deal. Later ... Scientists say if we don't find a way to travel back in time, earth is doomed. We'll figure it out. Later ... Scientists say - All the scientists are dead! Problem solved! *Cough!*
     
6. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2013-10-14 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2013-10-15 Pub. Date: 2013-10-14
Image Number: 102860
Caption: Welcome back to Punditspew. With me tonight is Democratic Rep. Dan Doormat, and Chairman of the Archaic Values Coalition Mr. Perkins. Gentlemen, why can't you compromise on the debt ceiling? I- OBAMACARE DIE! Um, when a law has passed, it's- INTRACTABLE HELLPRINCE! DEMEANER OF WAR DEAD! Believe me, I love compromising, but- AS PROPHESIED BY MICHELLE BACHMANN THE WISE: DEFAULT SHALL ENSUE, AND END TIMES SHALL BE UPON US. I still don't see why you two can't meet halfway. MARANATHA! OUR LORD COMETH!
     
7. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2012-09-10 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2012-09-11 Pub. Date: 2012-09-10
Image Number: 87424
Caption: Real-Life Scenes from the Democratic National Convention. Pill pack emcee at Planned Parenthood rally. Obama. Women. Gulf War vet and Obama supporter arguing with Occupy protester. Pig snout. Gulf War. My view of the convention hall. Excuse me! The butts of a thousand journalists squeezed in my face. Typical Dank media person: Bags under eyes from 4 hours of sleep, commuting from South Carolina. Cellphone dead. Laptop dead. Feet sore from walking miles around security fences. British reporter who had just come from Tampa. (Gender-neutral silhouette). The people at the RNC were a bunch of tosses! We have racists too, but at least they keep it hidden!
     
8. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2011-07-30 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2011-07-30 Pub. Date: 2011-07-30
Image Number: 89291
Caption: Slowpoke. Nation Stunned by Display of Competence. Our top story tonight: Millions of Americans are in shock that, after a decade of economic, environmental, and military FUBARS, we managed to do something right. OSAMASHOCK! "Emergency medical technicians are working round the clock to revive dazed and confused citizens." Bin Laden ... DEAD?!? We MUST have screwed the pooch somehow! Have a look at this cost-of-war counter. It'll bring you back to reality. "Dr. Alice Fernweaver, professor of western fubology, argues that killing Bin Laden is not necessarily at odds with our normal bumbling idiocy." The 21st century has been a nonstop series of clusterf#cks and epic fails resulting in the destruction of everything we touched. It was only a matter of time before we destroyed Bin Laden too. "Scientists predict that, at this rate, the next act of competence will occur in the year 2022." Our models indicate that that is the year we may finally stop bombing Afghanistan, or start addressing global warming. If we make it that long.
     
9. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2011-06-04 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2011-06-04 Pub. Date: 2011-06-04
Image Number: 89276
Caption: Slowpoke. Bulb wars. This is Mr. Perkins reporting live from Washington, DC where thousands of lightbulb activists are protesting the new energy efficiency laws. Hey hey ho ho! Curly bulbs have got to go! Lightbulbs don't waste electricity people waste electricity. Sir, why do you oppose the phase-out of the old bulbs? They aren't just bulbs - they're freedom filaments! You can pry my bulbs from my cold, dead lamps! Thomas Edison was a founding father, you know. The fluorescent bulbs contain mercury! Oh, so you're and environmentalist. You must be opposed to coal power too, since that produces mercury. I ... uh ... freedom filaments! Nice bulbmobile! If I wasn't living in my car because I was laid off and my home's been foreclosed, I'd definitely want my choice of bulb! Damn government!
     
10. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-10-31 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-10-31 Pub. Date: 2010-10-31
Image Number: 89902
Caption: Slowpoke. Bolstering accusations of sexual harassment, multiple witnesses have arrested to Clarence Thomas's porn obsession. Now you can experience it for yourself my joining the … Clarence Thomas Video Club. Community Service. Her sentence is … Servicing him! Anita's Hills Have Eyes. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely coincidental. Strict Construction. She wore her leather so tight, there was only one possible interpretation! Spread Eagle and Barely Legal. Censored. They make him proud to be an American. He's the Boss. Putting the "ass" in harassment! The Scales of Justice. I think this one makes a stronger case!
     
11. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-08-15 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-08-15 Pub. Date: 2010-08-15
Image Number: 89891
Caption: Slowpoke. In a strange land, the natives play a bizarre game in which some contestants start with a huge advantage. Score. Player 1. 132. Player 2. 0. Victory is achieved through a combination of skill and chance. Aw, @#*! Snake eyes AGAIN?! Ha ha! Winners receive lavish prizes, while losers are left for dead. Well, he LOST! Here lies Mr. Perkins. "He tried. The U.S. Economy: It's the ultimate in extreme gaming! It's like Calvinball, only better!
     
12. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-06-06 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-06-06 Pub. Date: 2010-06-06
Image Number: 90122
Caption: Slowpoke. New Uses For The Gulf of Mexico. Psychedelic undersea "plume shows." Groovy, man! Become "sister cesspools" with the Pearl River Delta of China. In the spirit of international friendship, I give you this oil-soaked egret from our waters. And for you, this dead eel. Eco-disaster duck tours. This wildlife refuge is now populated only by tar balls. Ooo! Oh hell, let's just give up and turn it into a dump. Give me your oil spills, big gulp cups, and packing peanuts yearning to be free.
     
13. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2010-04-12 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2010-04-12 Pub. Date: 2010-04-12
Image Number: 90115
Caption: Slowpoke. With "Iron Chef," "Chopped," and now "Food Wars," it seemed cooking shows are becoming more extreme. Coming soon to a cable channel near you … KILLER KITCHEN. THWACK! Contestants must create culinary masterpieces while flinging cooking implements at the opposing team. JULIENNED! The winning chef gets to shred the loser into a salad topping. Now THAT'S what I call a CHEF SALAD! Dish of the Dead. More brains! I'm not really tasting the baby flesh. Judges. Nuclear Noshin'. Who can prepare the best post-apocalyptic feast? And today's ingredients are ... Radioactive beetles and vaporized cow dust.
     
14. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2008-05-12 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2008-05-15 Pub. Date: 2008-05-12
Image Number: 91236
Caption: Slowpoke. The prevailing trend in business is paying nothing for online content. The Nothington Post. Ad Revenue. Pay contributors to our site? How very web 1.0! Meanwhile, oil is hitting record prices. Barrel of dead dinosaurs: $110. What if this were reversed? Oil barons struggle for survival. Gasoline only 15 cents a gallon! Well, I cant pay for it, but I'll give it some exposure in my weed whacker! ... While cartoonists are treated like Saudi royalty. $5,000 per strip! That is my final offer! Solid gold drawing board. Rare octopus ink. PLEASE! You must drop the price, or you will destroy the global economy! Government policy would be written my cartoon industry lobbyists. I've got some cartoon content for your campaign, Senator, if you'll support renaming Reagan National as B. Kliban National Airport! Right away, sir! And I want tax breaks for word balloons while you're at it!
     
15. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2007-01-01 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2007-01-01 Pub. Date: 2007-01-01
Image Number: 92347
Caption: Slowpoke. Are you PETRAEUSLY CORRECT? The Senate recently passed a resolution condemning an advertisement that dared to criticize General Petraeus. Confused about what you can and can't say about members of the military? I'm Professor Perkins, and I'm here to help! DO question the patriotism of a triple-amputee Vietnam vet, as the GOP did in attack ads against Sen. Max Cleland. Max Cleland claims he has the courage to lead ... But he's really Osama's best ho! DON'T dare point out that Gen. Petraeus has poppy seeds stuck in his teeth from his breakfast bagel. We're making progress in Anbar! DO mock John Kerry's wounds from Vietnam by passing out "Purple Heart Band-aids" at the Republican National Convention. Kerry got a widdle boo-boo! Snort! DON'T drop a newspaper featuring a photo of Petraeus on the floor. If you do, you must kiss it! I am SO sorry! DO dismiss the soldiers who wrote an op-ed in the New York Times that contradicted Petraeus' claims.* It was a liberal plot. Whatever you do, DON'T draw the general as Bush's leg-humping lapdog! Gen. Poodlus. Down, boy! This is a big no-no! Pfut. Congressional testimony. *Two of whom are now dead.
     
16. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2005-01-01 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2005-01-01 Pub. Date: 2005-01-01
Image Number: 92672
Caption: Slowpoke. How to get Americans to care about GENOCIDE. The situation in Darfur hasn't exactly been foremost in many people's minds. Sudan … That's one of those SUV-SEDAN COMBOS, isn't it? I want one of those. New chocolate SPLORTS. Puffed Nodes. Here are some attention-getting ideas ... Since mutilated people aren't causing much hoopla, perhaps we need a Sudanese Elian. Dammit! These kids have too many scars and missing limbs. I need cute! Bring me the next batch! TV auditions. Er, I believe they've been slaughtered, sir. Or ... THE NOT-SO-SIMPLE-LIFE- New reality show featuring Paris Hilton being chased by the Januaweed Militia. That machete is so 2002. Or: Darfur: The Movie - Starring Russell Crowe as an aid worker. Unfortunately comes out in 2009, after a million people are dead. Whoa ... Did this actually happen?
     
17. Jen Sorensen  Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons 2002-01-01 dead 
Cartoonist(s): Jen Sorensen
Comic/Cartoon: Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Viewable Date: 2002-01-01 Pub. Date: 2002-01-01
Image Number: 92652
Caption: Slowpoke. Accidental Hipsters. Eleanor McMurty, 67. Retired bookkeeper. In quest for a comfortable pair of walking shoes, unwittingly purchased extremely hip, 1975-reissue nylon Converse trainers. James Goodbeard, 48. Classics professor. Desiring warm winter outer-wear, bought massively puffy Tommy Hilfiger down jacket, wholly unaware of its urban symbolism. Sarah Sanders, 19. College student. Sports dead Kennedys t-shirt out of confusion thinking "DK" logo stands for Delta Kappa Sorority to which she belongs. Jack Berger, 56. Yam farmer. Tragically unconscious of fact that entire wardrobe is a gold mine of proletariat Kitsch highly coveted by ironic twenty-somethings.
     
Result page:     (17 images)