Slowpoke. The Need for Speed. I'd like a Pronto Patty and a Pepsi … And make it snappy! Burger Pope. Earn your college degree in just 15 minutes! INSTALUM Online University. YES! Take me through my six-second freshman orientation now! Go! GET FIT IN ONLY 2 MINUTES A DAY! Total body workout for the busy executive! As Seen On TV. Why waste 70 years when you can live your life in HALF AN HOUR? Try new Lifekwik! tm.
Jen Sorensen's Editorial Cartoons
Slowpoke. More Kneejerkin'. It's time for another round of "Kneejerkin'," the game in which I try to get ordinary people to oppose their own beliefs! It's easy - just watch! Quick - Who's more of a "real American"; someone from Indiana or Maryland? What a silly question. What about someone from "the heartland" or a "costal elite"? The heartland of course! Score! Hello there, sir! How should we respond to the housing crisis? Do we need consumer protections? Why, absolutely! How about reams of regulation? Uh! Regulation bad! Make brain hurt! Score again! Excuse me - Do you think the country needs to head in a completely different direction? Yes indeedy. Are you voting for McCain? Yep! I just like him! Bingo! Three for three! Next week: Wedge Issue Wedgies!